Hi Anna...a tea party with small people? Umm, do you mean children? I missed out when I was little. I didn't even know what a tea party was until just a few years ago!
Let me tell you about these tea parties....No, not the political kind...Beautiful tea parties...
I have a friend who has an amazing gift of hospitality. She is a beautiful woman with some German ancestry that she puts to good use. My friend has collections of the most beautiful china sets. I think most are antique. But, she gets them out for us (myself and a couple of other friends and our daughters). She sets the table with the most delectable goodies. (I eat a ton of them when I go over there). Tea, coffee, hot chocolate, apple cider, ice water are all choices set out for us to fill our tea cups, or the beautiful glasses that she also has set out. Just to look at the arrangement of fruit, dips, cookies, turtle cheese cake, chex mix, and chocolates set beautifully in the midst of the most beautiful china and silverware is EYE-CANDY.
My friend has the personality to go with all of this hospitality. She is vibrant, energetic, and wise and funny all wrapped up in one person! My other friends are just as beautiful with the tenderness, wisdom, and transparency that they bring.
I love going to these tea parties because it makes me feel like a girl. I don't often get a chance to dress up. In Minnesota, the American Siberia, jeans and layers and layers of clothing are my choice, whatever is the warmest. But, I feel like getting "dolled" up for the tea parties.
At these tea parties, we laugh, we cry, we encourage, we pray... These Christian ladies bring all that they are to the table, so to speak, and share in vulnerablity and trust. What is on the table is just a manifestation of what has happened around the table. Friendship was planted, and has blossomed, and continues to grow and strengthen.
Can you see why these tea parties help me carry the load? These ladies walked with me through so many struggles, even through all the cancer treatment with Jay.
We have been having the tea parties for a few years now. This partying goes on just about every week. Not everybody can make it. Me? Well, I have to work around Dennis's and CC's work schedules and Toby's naptime. Sometimes, Toby comes along (he is a busy boy, though, and tea time for him can be a challenge). Sometimes, the gathering needs to be post-poned for another week. But, we still meet together.
We all need other people, a community. God did not create us to be alone. Otherwise, there would be just one person on this earth. Now, how boring would that be??
The way I was raised, pain, tears, troubles, were all ignored, scolded, or ridiculed. I learned to hide my feelings, and keep my troubles to myself growing up. We lived in the country. So, I took very long walks with my dog in the woods. (never thought about wild animals. hmm...nothing ever showed itself either). I would even go in the middle of the night for these walks whether it was Winter, Summer, or Spring, or Fall. Ok, I didn't go during hunting season. But, I learned to keep to myself, hide in my room, or go off by myself in the woods.
That coping mechanism is still around. I "hole" myself up, or isolate myself from others. I guess I don't know how to handle pain around other people. Is it our culture, or is it just me? Anyway, the cure seems to be, for me, to get out of my "hole" and get around people, the very thing that is uncomfortable for me to do. I have to use everything I have got to do this. Writing on here helps give me some footing. When others reach out to me, that helps. Ultimately, I have to get out of myself and give my rear a good push.
But, when you have a tea party like the one I have described above, how can one resist? Especially, when there is chocolate. I forgot to mention chocolate. Have I ever told you about how I feel about chocolate? It is a great coping tool. So, friends, eye-candy, goodies including chocolate pull me out of my house and down the street a couple of blocks to my dear friend's Victorian dwelling. Inside, there is the best cure of all, love.
~Heidi
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